Well, this kind of question already make me confuse almost long time ago.... perhaps i don't believe or trust anyone?? Don't know why i still prefer alone or what... When someone had been forgotten me i will feel like she/he had betray me behind... That the main reason i won't simply tell my own problem with someone unless i feel i have confidant with he/she... Or maybe i need a listener to listen what i had face these few years... Yeah, life is tough but we still have to face it...
Well, i also don't know what happen actually happen to me after these years. Lost of the feeling angry when people laugh behind me when they purposely make joke in front of me. I don't feel anything weird about these world until people came to me and tell me the truth to me that they had make use of me and purposely want to blame me if our team lost in volleyball competition for them to release their stress.
Sometime i feel that i'm very idiot when "friend" had invite me to join their trip to play in prangin so i had apply a late pass for that night until the day before outing they still need send another "friend" to inform me that i can't join them because they had replace with another "friend"... I was very angry with them for throwing me behind yet i have to settle my late pass issue since i was in hostel whole day without going anywhere... The next day someone feel very embarrassed when they knew that one of them din't eat anything while they having dinner but not because of "put airplane" on me... The "friend" who come to inform me feel very sorry to me so i have forgive all of them and let this issue pass...
But, it seem like not that easy... One day our collage having a welcome party for new group who join in this collage and i had plan to come down for dinner before go to party. I had discuss with 1 of them about the time to going down to having dinner together yet when the time reach they went down together without calling me down until i have to come out and find out what happen. I was realize that i have been forgotten by them especially the girl who is i close with. I feel very fed up with all of them and i had start realize that the girl was changed. Before that someone had mention before that someone told her that she had changed... Don't know why... i feel like she had betray me behind...
I don't want to think too much about this because if i think too much, i feel like i'm the person who jealous with another people who close with her. She was the first person who very close with me in Collage in first week yet now she had close with another person. When i had knock her door and invite her to go dinner on Sunday, most of the time she had refuse because the person she close with will bring her going out for dinner... Beside that, i feel like i'm idiot when i came to two of them when having 5 minute break. Just standing for doing noting...
Because of that i think that i better get far away from her from now on so i won't meet her if possible. I know i was trying to eacape away from truth but yet i still want to continue it. I don't wish to because a idiot person who always stay beside her forever cause i know one day they will throw me alone. In my heart she still is my best friend in the collage but for her i think the person who always treat her was the best friend in her heart... Thank to her, i recover from my high fever within few days. The day she having high fever, i was "scold" by one of them for do not know she was having high fever after dinner. I feel like i was very unless and unable to help her that day and her best friend was going out buy the thing that stick at forehead for her.
Maybe you all think that i'm idiot. Yes i admit that i'm idiot for not doing anything. Most of them told me before that don't always blame myself yet i have to blame myself for useless... I can not do anything when she having high fever but she had sacrifice herself to take care of me. Although i trying to get far away from her, inside my heart she still is my best friend in the collage... Bye bye... Wish you can stay happy together with her...
Well, i also don't know what happen actually happen to me after these years. Lost of the feeling angry when people laugh behind me when they purposely make joke in front of me. I don't feel anything weird about these world until people came to me and tell me the truth to me that they had make use of me and purposely want to blame me if our team lost in volleyball competition for them to release their stress.
Sometime i feel that i'm very idiot when "friend" had invite me to join their trip to play in prangin so i had apply a late pass for that night until the day before outing they still need send another "friend" to inform me that i can't join them because they had replace with another "friend"... I was very angry with them for throwing me behind yet i have to settle my late pass issue since i was in hostel whole day without going anywhere... The next day someone feel very embarrassed when they knew that one of them din't eat anything while they having dinner but not because of "put airplane" on me... The "friend" who come to inform me feel very sorry to me so i have forgive all of them and let this issue pass...
But, it seem like not that easy... One day our collage having a welcome party for new group who join in this collage and i had plan to come down for dinner before go to party. I had discuss with 1 of them about the time to going down to having dinner together yet when the time reach they went down together without calling me down until i have to come out and find out what happen. I was realize that i have been forgotten by them especially the girl who is i close with. I feel very fed up with all of them and i had start realize that the girl was changed. Before that someone had mention before that someone told her that she had changed... Don't know why... i feel like she had betray me behind...
I don't want to think too much about this because if i think too much, i feel like i'm the person who jealous with another people who close with her. She was the first person who very close with me in Collage in first week yet now she had close with another person. When i had knock her door and invite her to go dinner on Sunday, most of the time she had refuse because the person she close with will bring her going out for dinner... Beside that, i feel like i'm idiot when i came to two of them when having 5 minute break. Just standing for doing noting...
Because of that i think that i better get far away from her from now on so i won't meet her if possible. I know i was trying to eacape away from truth but yet i still want to continue it. I don't wish to because a idiot person who always stay beside her forever cause i know one day they will throw me alone. In my heart she still is my best friend in the collage but for her i think the person who always treat her was the best friend in her heart... Thank to her, i recover from my high fever within few days. The day she having high fever, i was "scold" by one of them for do not know she was having high fever after dinner. I feel like i was very unless and unable to help her that day and her best friend was going out buy the thing that stick at forehead for her.
Maybe you all think that i'm idiot. Yes i admit that i'm idiot for not doing anything. Most of them told me before that don't always blame myself yet i have to blame myself for useless... I can not do anything when she having high fever but she had sacrifice herself to take care of me. Although i trying to get far away from her, inside my heart she still is my best friend in the collage... Bye bye... Wish you can stay happy together with her...
